Thursday, December 17, 2009
Today is a completely off topic day. As hard as it is for me to admit, I can't get into Christmas this year. I pride myself on being optimistic, seeing the bright side of life and moving forward but I am coming to realize that I just need to allow myself to face my feelings and accept that this is a year to take a step back, forgive myself for whatever it is that I think I could have, should have done differently. Anyone who has ever gone through a divorce may know what I am feeling. This will be the first Christmas in 27 years that our whole family will not be together, it's hard.
I know that time has an amazing way of healing, I pray that this time next year I will have my usual zeal for the season back. I am not a person who usually shares her personal emotions but I guess I feel the need to stop denying and mark this season as one of those life milestones that in the end will only make me stronger and wiser.